Ladies Who Lunch

My friend of 18 years. (Has it been that long?) We lived across the porch at Wymount Terrace while our husbands were going to BYU. Her husband is making the BIG bucks as the controller of a major corporation, (he and I went to the same mission) and she is the only person I know who takes those great Disney Cruises.

I love Becky 'cause I can send her all my raunchy email forwards and she doesn't get offended.

If you go out to lunch with me, you can expect to be on my blog.

Of Cleats and Ipods

The young woman called her mother early one Monday afternoon.
"I found my Ipod!" she enunciated over her cell phone.
Flabbergasted, the mother cried back,
"What! Where? When?"
"In my cleats! Remember I left my gear bag in my locker over the weekend, because I was sick and I couldn't go to practice all last week?" "Well, I gotta go to practice, bye!"
The young woman was off the phone in a flash; under the assumption that the mother would automatically drop whatever she was doing to fly to Provo High School to pick her up after softball practice.

Well, the young woman was correct in her assumption. The mother will drop everything. She will stop in the middle of dinner preparations, laundry folding, and most importantly... the finale of whatever the Barefoot Contessa is concocting on her show, to fly off to pick the young woman up after softball practice.

The mother vaguely remembers putting the Ipod in the cleats. It was supposed to serve as a wake up moment for the young woman when she finally found them. The young woman was supposed to grasp the fact that never in a million years would she, herself, ever have put the Ipod in a stinky, disgusting cleat. Only the busy, overworked, under appreciated mother would have pulled off such a stunt.

And, the young woman was supposed to feel chastened. Supposed to feel slightly ashamed of herself for losing such an expensive possesion. The irony of the smelly cleat was totally lost on the young woman, she had no idea of the lesson lost.

The mother has given up on parenting, and is now in the process of turning over all parenting duties to the father.

Where oh Where Can the Ipod Be?

Has this ever happened to you? You spend a lot of money on a toy for your child; such as a Gameboy or an Ipod. You are happy to do this for them because they swear they will take care of it. They do their chores, they get good grades, they are deserving of your trust. Then a few weeks or days passes, and you start to see the expensive toy laying on the living room floor, for a day or two at a time. Does this behavior irk you the way it does me?

Well my natural inclination is to pick up the toy, in this case an Ipod, and put it in a safe place until the child begins to miss it. They are supposed to panic a little because they know if they mention they have misplaced it to you, you will get mad at their carelessness and abuse of the Ipod. Then they are supposed to learn their lesson by having to look and worry about it for a few days in silence, on their own. Then finally, they will take the risk of earning your wrath by saying they have misplaced the Ipod and come to you as a supplicant hoping you can help them find it, or better yet, whip it out of your purse and say "See, I told you so", and get the Ipod back.

Moms and Dads, this has happened to all of us right? I hope I am not the only sadistic parent out there who has secretly stashed a toy! But, am I the only parent out there who has forgotten where they put the Ipod? FORGOTTEN if they even took the Ipod? Vaguely remember that it could have been you who lost the Ipod? (because this is a ploy I have used to great success in the past, it certainly seems like something I would do) We cannot find the Ipod. I have NO IDEA where to look or even if I took it. Now who is playing mind games with who? I am the worried person who is fretting about the Ipod. Well I have confessed to my child that it is probably me who lost the Ipod, and I took my medicine like an adult. I am now writing this blog whilst on a break from tearing the house apart looking for the Ipod.

I will keep you posted, I know you are on the edge of your seats.

Recent Pathetic Brushes With Fame

Don't ever play any kind of trivia game with me, 'cause I will blow you out of the water. I have no head for numbers or science, but pop culture is one of my strengths. We were playing a trivia game on the airplane where you go up against other passengers on the same flight. The game gave your seat number, and your stats, and yes, I was the winner.

Here are a few of some lesser known celebrities we have seen lately. This doesn't include David Letterman et al.

Cherry Jones
The actress with the Cutest Name, we spotted leaving "Gypsy".
This actress has had supporting roles in every M.Night Shyamalan movie and was Matt Damon's mother in "Ocean's 12."

Vincent Pastore

The Scariest Celebrity; we spotted him in New York, walking down Broadway.
Most recently on the "Apprentice" and we all know he met a fishy ending in the "Soprano's" as Salvatore "Big Pussy" Bonpensiero.

Bobbi Brown
(my photo)
The Richest Celebrity; we spotted her signing autographs at Bloomingdale's
For those who don't read "In Style" or visit many cosmetics counters, Bobbi Brown has a mega cosmetics line, and was made known to me when Barbara Walters did the Monica Lewinsky interview and everyone was scrambling to find out who's lipstick she was wearing.


Laurell K. Hamilton
The most graphic/goth celebrity.
Known for her scary as hell vampire novels featuring that very human vampire executioner; Anita Blake. This was at a book signing in SLC.


Trumpet roll please...for the most fun and ridiculous celebrity spotting ever!


Bertini
That creepy male model from America's Next Top Model Cycle 4. My kids and I will watch this re-run every time, just to watch him steal the show from that Meany Keenyah.
I saw him in front of St Patrick's Cathedral on 5th Ave. The minute he started talking I knew it was him. If you have 9 minutes to spare you can watch it at
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWLkChagKZ4&feature=PlayList&p=71EEF363C2CB7082&index=52
or just fast forward through it.
(me and the girls are the only ones who care)

Mother/Daugher Differences

Can you spot the differences in these pictures?

(Answers: about 100 pounds, 50 wrinkles, 1,000 gray hairs, 75 age spots, and perfect vision.)

As we were on the flight home, Christina and I got pretty bored and these pictures were part of the outcome of our silliness.

I have been a blessed woman to be the mother of three daughters. Each one is as different as tulips, daisies and roses are from each other; each breathtakingly beautiful, but individually unique. Christina and I have a very open relationship, with many aspects. Brutal honesty, is a must when dealing with Christina, she can tell if she is being deceived. She insists on liberty and justice for all...including animals. Jordan is the saucy tartlett, the attention getter, the self proclaimed "hoochie mama of the Bureau", everyone's best friend. Malaina is the stalwart student of fact, analytical, practical, gellical, and sensitive as a cat's whiskers, and in her own words.."speaks fluent dork". One of my favorite holidays; Mother's Day. With children like mine, who can blame me?

Yes,We Are Coming Home..Tomorrow

You few readers of my blog are probably thinking...crap, another blog from New York? I am so sick of this woman and her stupid adventures. When is she going to come home to her husband and children? Well, I am coming home after I tell you about the Yankee's/Red Sox game. Oh my gosh, I had so much fun watching the Yankee fans screaming at the Red Sox fans in the stands. There was this one guy who was so loud; he was sitting about 5 rows behind us and I kid you not, he single handedly started about 4 stadium wide cheers! Anyhoo...he started to get so drunk and profane that he was caught in the act throwing things at people in red. The cops came up in two's and took his ass down! Manny Ramirez hit two home run's, and the Yankee fans were furious at their star pitcher the "useless", Mike Mussina, (I quote directly from a Yankee fan, I remain NEUTRAL).

• 200 dollars Yankee tickets(Behind Home Plate!)
• 12 dollars Cracker Jacks
• 5 dollars peanuts
• 8 dollars Subway tickets
• 15 dollars Pizza and pop (1 of each)
• 10 dollars disposable camera (I forgot my fancy camera)
• Last season for Yankee Stadium and a MLB game with my daughter... PRICELESS.

How many people can say they saw the fabulous, amazing, stupendous, ledgendary Patty Lupone in one of the most famous roles ever created for the Broadway stage!? Well, I am an ingnoramous when I say I had no idea that there were so many famous songs from Gypsy! Three famous ones.."Let Me Entertain You", (Ginger Grant sang that on Gilligans Island), "Wherever We Go" (Marcia Brady and Carol Brady sang that on the Brady Bunch) "Everything's Coming up Roses"(made famous by the LOUD Ethyl Merman).

One of my family's favorite movies is "To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything, Julie Newmar", with Patrick Swayze, and Wesley Snipes. Well there are several references in that movie that come from "Gypsy"; Remember when Patrick is dressed up in drag for the first time as Miss Vita Boheme, and he looks in the mirror and says.."Here comes momma!"? Well, straight from Gypsy.

This is The Glad(and slightly indulged) Housewife signing off from The Big Apple, and saying farewell to a fabulous town!

Harlem is Hot!

Here are a few photo's of our recent visit to Harlem. It really is experiencing a Renaissance. I was very uplifted with what I saw. Where once a dilapitaed building lurked, it is now a vital new affordble housing building with business like: M.A.C. Cosmetics, Lane Bryant, Aeropostle, and Starbucks,as flagship stores. To deter the past problems like, Slumlord difficulties, crackhouses etc... If you buy a building in Harlem you must live in it. A few years ago, Brownstone townhouses used to sell for a few thousand dollars, they are now selling for several Hundred Thousand Dollars and crime is at an all time low. Harlem residents are learning skills and receiving higher educations thus bringing vital dollars into the area.

It was great seeing great landmarks like the Apollo Theatre, and the Cotton Club. I was amazed to learn that the second largest religion was Islam in Harlem, next to Southern Baptism as its largest denomination. Did you know that all "Madam Alexander" dolls are all born in Harlem?

Nightlife in New York

The POPE is in town this weekend, hence, the blue lit Empire State Building, this is the view from our hotel window, by the way.

This is my father sacrificing what is left of his hearing, by entertaining Christina's desire to visit as many Hard Rock Cafe's as possible before she dies.We got great tickets for the musical "HAIRSPRAY".
Here is a totally bootlegged photo I took of the dancers. The fat lady in the red is actually George Wendt, the actor from "Cheer's" who played "Norm".

Bronx is Up, Battery Down

Behind the buildingshown here is the Manhattan New York Temple. It is a small building in a city full of giants. Imagine our surprise when we looked up and saw Moroni poking up over the this building here in the foreground.

Here I am at the show in high spirits. The guest was Amy Poelher, from "Baby Mama", with Tina Fey, she is the surrogate mother in the film. Check it out on Friday and see if you can hear me laughing. The lady guitarist Felicia is way prettier in person. The band does play through the breaks. The set looks smaller in person. Letterman is larger than life. You can understand why he is successful.

Christina is scared of the pretty moth; at the Museum of Natural History. It was larger than the span of a man's hand. They had a great butterfly exhibit where you can go into a "tropical climate" (nothing new there right?) and get up close and personal with the butterflies.

Navigating New York

Littly Italy, charming, but no Italians left in this neighborhood.
Lady Liberty in the background. Cute girl in foreground.
On the free fantastic Staten Island Ferry. The skyline is hard to look at without the Twin Towers. I am sure Native New Yorkers still hate to even look out the ferry windows. On a lighter note, I look really fat, cause I am hiding a fanny pack under the coat. (And cause I eat too much)

Top of the Rock. (Rockefeller Center)

Broadway Babies

Okay, just a quick little blog to let you know we have arrived in one piece. (Times Square)

Is this up or down? Well it is up, in fact it is Trump Towers on Fifth Avenue. The door man was about 7 ft. tall.

The Doorman at the F.A.O. Schwartz Toy Store.

Beloved Biologist

Kudos to my middle child Svetlana "Svetti".
Hail to her marketable talents.
Biology Major Extrodinaire.
Classical Guitarist Supreme.
The most photogenic Gaddis in all history! (this girl cannot take a bad photo)

(The above bragging was well deserved. This cute display; BYU's Internship Fair)

Letterman Here We Come!!!

Okay, so I was having the worst day in my life today. I slept about 3 hours (no joke), my shoulder is giving me problems, pms, I even got a call from a bill collector about a doctor bill from 2005!! yada yada..blah blah. You know the story. I am sitting at the kitchen counter when my cell phone rings. I look at the number and reject the call since I have no idea the origination.
I proceed to listen to the message and about fell off my stool.

Backstory:
Several months ago, back when I began the plans for our spring vacation to NYC I vaguely remember applying for Letterman tickets. There were several hoops to jump through, so I thought little of my chances, see for yourself: http://www.cbs.com/latenight/lateshow/show_info/tickets/form/
Well, I hadn't heard back from them so I assumed I didn't apply with enough time. I had heard it could take months to get tickets.

Back to today:
So I listen to the message and it is Keith from the David Letterman Show telling me to call him right back if we still want tickets for Monday the 14th. I didn't quite listen correctly to the messege and forgot to write down the phone number he gave me thinking that I could just call the number that showed up on my phone. I started to panic, because I kept getting an obscure message about voice mail and passwords. I didn't realize I was calling my own voice-mail box. My brain in is a fog because of a pain killer I had taken earlier in the day and I am terrified I have lost out on my chance to go to the show! Jordan had me calm down and I re-listened to the voice-mail. I called the number and
Keith answered right away, "David Letterman, this is Keith".

I said, "This is Cynthia, I want the tickets!!" how stupid must I have sounded? I didn't give my last name or anything. He was so friendly, he got my last name, and he asked me several questions about the likeliness of not being able to attend. But here is the gist:

1. I have to be at the Ed Sullivan Theater at 1697 Broadway with my Dad, Nathan, with our picture ID's (you must be 18.) Poor Tiny will have to wait at the Residence Inn for us. He was very specific about the ticket holders names, address' and even our cellphones. The tickets are not transferable.
   
2. I have to take a jacket cause Letterman keeps the theater at 55 degrees.
   
3. We need to be in line between 4:30 and 5:30 (guaranteed tickets!)
4. And I have to give a 'password'. I will give you the password after I see the show.
5. The show is taping on the 14th. It will air on Friday the 18th, and the guests are not confirmed yet. Keith told me to keep checking the web site. (Please let it be Dennis Quaid!!) but he was just on not too long ago so... grrr!
6. Bring tons of ENERGY.
   

One interesting thing:I had to answer a trivia question. I was so nervous. I am excellent at trivia, but who knows right? The question was about Paul Shaffer; I just had to tell Keith what instrument Paul played! Ha! When I was retelling all that to my Dad about the trivia question my Dad said "What does he play?" I swear I have watched Letterman with my Dad about 100 times.
So now I have to pray that Delta doesn't cancel our flight. Think happy thoughts and check back, I will try to blog a few times next week.

Ultimate Baking

You have probably seen the cookbook at left many times by now. Well I pre-ordered it last December and when I received it this last month my mouth watered, and my stomach rumbled. Most of all, my hands went to work. I made the above creation, thank you very much. It is the Iced Hermit recipe from the Cookies book and it is on page 102. It was one of the few recipes that didn't have a photo. What attracted me to this recipe was the large amount of candied ginger. It is my favorite ingredient besides the chocolate chip. It can be purchased in bulk from the Good Earth for a paltry 3 dollars a pound. It is great to snack on because a little goes a long way. And, it is good for your digestive system. See all these are fabulous reasons to make this fabulous bar cookie. And you thought baked goods were bad for your thighs. Sigh....